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Post Traumatic Sacrifice Disorder

Post Traumatic Sacrifice Disorder

Exodus 11:4b-6, 8b

“’…About midnight I will go out in the midst of Egypt, and every firstborn in the land of Egypt shall die. … There shall be a great cry throughout all the land of Egypt, such as there has never been, nor ever will be again.’” … And he went out from Pharaoh in hot anger.

The firefighters who run into burning buildings to rescue their neighbors expose their own lungs to toxic fumes. The soldiers who put themselves in harm’s way to protect fellow citizens witness horrors that sear their minds. Women who bravely bring children into the world suffer from nausea and hormonal swings and wear the emotional and physical stretch marks of motherhood. The fact is we can’t do anything heroic for others without getting a little scarred ourselves, a little burned from the fires of self-sacrifice as it were, and that’s where Moses finds himself after painful plagues and countless hours of pleading with Pharaoh. He’s reached his boiling point.

Maybe he’s a little angry at God for putting him through the debacle. Maybe he’s a little angry at the Hebrew slaves who haven’t yet given him the thanks he deserves for his toil. But he’s mostly seething at this pompous windbag of a king who’d rather watch the world burn than say “I’m sorry.” And right now, as he faces a tenth rejection from Pharaoh, I bet his mind flashes back to forty-some years ago when he strangled a heartless Egyptian soldier for far less. I bet the blood’s rushing through his hands, and his fingers are trembling on the staff, and he’s doing everything in his power to hold back that raging lion of a spirit that wants to claw its way out and snap this donkey-king’s neck for good.

Friend, you’re going to fail to keep your cool in the fire of affliction sometimes. You’re going to storm out of rooms and slam doors behind you. You’re going to fight battles for others that leave you wounded. But keep bringing your burdens and burnouts to Jesus! Look at His hands, His feet, His side! If anyone can help you cope with the trauma of self-sacrificing love, it’s Him.